Left unknown.

You know I've been through so much. I accepted them. I never blame anyone. I know everything was my fault. I dont have the right to ask him back. I dont have the right to see him wishing me. I dont have the right to even meet him. Like seriously, if god were to punish me for anything I've done wrongly. It can be any punishment. I would accept it but why js. Ain't it too cruel for me. After all, I'm just a girl. I know there's so many fishes out there. But no, not what I want. I don't need so many fish. And why the heck do I need to choose other fish? We aint going for grocery shopping. People has been blaming me why you so stubborn. Why you this why you that. Please. If only I know why I like that. If only I'm that great to control my feelings perfectly. If so I wont even need to be here. Am I greedy? I've always asking for god to let things be alright. I've always been praying for him to be back. I never stop doing this. And I knew I have to accept the fact that js will never ever like me back, again. Miracle doesn't exists isnt? So does wishes. Birthday wishes aint accurate at all. I didn't know everything can come at once, today. My limit has reached the max.. I'm done with all these. You know what, I'm really jealous of those girls who has bf. They have the one that be there for them no matter what, pampering them. Im really jealous of it. But I didnt find one. I knew its easy to step out and get a bf. Its not hard. But I cant even do it. I cant even fall for another guy. All I can do was just looking at them couples. And imagine he was right next besides me. Dumb much. Things cant be anymore simpler. I just need js to be here. And his hug. The warmest hug that never fails to calm me down.